Checking out different architectural styles and designs from different eras in Copenhagen’s history. In addition, exploring the Opera House, Nyhavn, and Frederik’s Church by foot and by boat during my stay in the Summer of 2024.
Camera: iPhone 15
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
“This surreal experience of mine in the local coffee shop was seeing mostly everyone except for myself wrapped up exclusively in their device, mobile, computer, or another kind of technology rather than interacting with their immediate surroundings.”
Surreal moments often catch you off guard and recently, one hit me in a coffee shop that I like to frequent. These moments are important to reflect on for better or worse though, to see how society has changed immeasurably and perhaps permanently. This surreal experience of mine in the local coffee shop was seeing mostly everyone except for myself wrapped up exclusively in their device, mobile, computer, or another kind of technology rather than interacting with their immediate surroundings.
It was shocking, usually there are a few people browsing their phones casually, catching up on work with their laptops, or just tracking their health data on their digital watch. However, when I looked around and saw that it was basically a sea of screens as each person was locked into their digital world rather than focused on the people there. It was a dystopian scene that is burned into my memory now so much so that I had to explore this societal change further.
In the U.S. especially, it seems like cafes or coffee houses are more for interacting with the digital realm rather than the physical realm, which is quite different from Europe and Latin America where the priority is to meet people or gather with friends or family. It is usually a mix, but in the U.S., cafes seem to have reached a turning point. They focus more on having people be there to work and endure loud or constant music being played in the background, and having people isolated rather than connecting with one another.
While there are still numerous cafes where people are still likely to do poetry slams, play trivia, and are welcoming gathering spaces, my concern is with how eerie it can be when some cafes are solely about work and technology rather than connection and leisure. There are some solutions out there and some bars I’ve heard are even implementing ‘no phones’ as an entry rule to help people to interact with each other rather than their own devices in a shared space.
I personally hope that the ‘no phones’ movement can spread to cafes, community centers, and other third spaces that are increasingly difficult to find in the U.S., especially where you don’t need to pay to sit down, talk, or get to know one another. Having a ‘no technology’ rule for set hours in cafés seems like a great idea to me, especially before or after work hours and making sure that cafes and co-working spaces are not merging to be the same. Community events with no phones would help people sharpen their social skills, minimize distractions, and connect without any devices competing for their attention.
It was jarring for me to see almost the whole café on some sort of device or another except for myself (even though I do tend to check my phone quickly here and there). However, I was meeting someone there so I wanted my attention to be paid to them as much as possible and I am for a technology ban so the connection we would form would be that much easier. Having a rule of ‘no phones’ in cafes or at least ‘no tech’ hours would probably make people happier, more sociable, and allow cafes to sell more to people who would have their undivided attention.
We used to get our dopamine from our social connections and that has been increasingly replaced by responsive AI chatbots, persistent social media notifications, and algorithms focused on our every need. It’s a losing battle right now but we may be at a precipice where people including myself realize that this isn’t sustainable and it isn’t healthy for society to indulge in without limits, even for adults.
One of my favorite shows growing up was ‘Friends’ and ‘Seinfeld’, where the all-American diner or the local café was a spot to hang out, talk, play music, and catch up on each other’s lives. These shows from the 1990s-2000s could not possibly be replicated today because the scenes would be showing almost everyone on their phone or laptop and the dialogues would be flat or lackluster. I want cafés, diners, and bars to be more than background noise for our technological devices. Instead, these places should be spaces to connect, to share, and to find a moment of human interaction in a world increasingly dominated by screens.
Cafés, diners, and bars should be refuges from screens, spaces to connect, share, and find a moment of human interaction in a world dominated by devices. It’s time to reclaim these public places, not just for nostalgia, but for our social health. We still need public places to provide a respite from the hustle and bustle of daily life, to let us express ourselves freely, to meet new people, to practice community, and maybe even make some new friends.
A visit on a beautiful Summer day in July 2024 to Christianshavn neighborhood and the notorious yet highly touristy Freetown Christiania comune in Copenhagen, Denmark.
Camera: iPhone 15
Location: Christianshavn and Freetown Christiania; Copenhagen, Denmark
“The main message I took away from this film, and which has been rattling around in my head since I saw it a few days ago is to never degrade yourself for money, power, or fame.”
*Spoilers ahead for the 2025 film, ‘Marty Supreme’, Directed by Josh Safdie*
Even when a movie is based on a fictional story, there are still kernels of truth that can be taken from it. Such is the case for the critically acclaimed and highly rated movie that came out recently on Christmas Day, 2025: ‘Marty Supreme.’ Without giving away too much of the movie’s plot and setting, I’ll focus instead on a major theme from the movie and how it applies to real life. The main message I took away from this film, and which has been rattling around in my head since I saw it a few days ago is to never degrade yourself for money, power, or fame.
The main character of ‘Marty Supreme’, Marty Mauser, an up-and-coming tennis table contender on the world stage who’s also chasing fame, fortune, and notoriety in pursuing his overall dream of being the best. He also has his eyes and heart set on pursuing a beautiful movie star he comes across on a table tennis tour (despite her being a married woman).
Marty is a polarizing yet mesmerizing character but like the rest of the film’s characters, you can’t help being enamored by his boundless vision, clear goal, and strong determination. Despite my sympathizing with Marty in terms of his drive, work ethic, and grit, the film does a great job of showing how one’s morality, one’s relationships, and ultimate one’s soul can be corrupted in the pursuit of fulfilling a lifelong dream despite the obstacles involved, but at what cost to oneself?
Without giving away too many spoilers as I do encourage you to see the film before making your own judgment, Marty continually degrades himself in his behavior towards others, his association with shady characters who want to see him humiliated on purpose, and in his callous treatment towards competitors who stand in the way of his overall goal. In ‘Marty Supreme’, I found it as an overall cautionary tale for me and others in pursuit of our own goals and dreams in life in treading carefully. No dream, vision, or goal is worth losing your soul over. Think about the limits you should place on yourself in achieving your goals or dreams because you should assuredly do so to protect your soul. One that is a non-negotiable for me and hopefully for others is to not degrade yourself in any way for either money, power, or fame.
Keeping one’s morals, values, and character intact is priceless and no amount of money, power, or fame should ever change that. You must draw boundaries and limits with other people especially when they promise to help you in achieving your goal. Unfortunately, Marty Mauser forgets that in ‘Marty Supreme’ and it ends up costing him dearly along the way. He degrades himself to receive financial assistance in exchange to help him reach his long-desired goal but in the process of doing so, he loses his dignity, self-respect, and humiliates himself in front of other people. Any of our dreams can turn into real nightmares if we don’t impose non-negotiables or boundaries on ourselves and on others on what we are willing to tolerate to achieve success.
There is nothing wrong with having a strong competitive spirit, pushing yourself to the limit mentally or physically, and narrowing your focus on achieving a big goal or dream. However, where you run into possible problems or issues is when you put others in the driver’s seat and let them dictate the terms of how, why, or what they want you to do to achieve money, power, or other success. Don’t lose control over your own destiny and don’t be so desperate to achieve your goal or dream that you embarrass, humiliate, or otherwise degrade yourself to make it a reality. You never want to put your own autonomy at risk, get in deep with dirtbags or scoundrels, or sacrifice your friendships or relationships in the pursuit of your own success.
Being able to walk away, say no, and keep your morals intact is worth more than all the gold and glory that this life has to offer. Remember to evaluate the character and morals of those people you surround yourself with on the road to your goal or dream. Be able to step back, assess who you’re getting involved with, what’s their possible angle in supporting you, and do they have your best interests at heart or are they using you to an end? I’ve watched this dynamic unfold time and again, from front-page scandals to the corridors of power, where money and ambition slowly corrode the very friendships and relationships that once mattered most.
Success that requires you to abandon your dignity isn’t success. It’s a transaction with a price you’ll eventually regret paying. ‘Marty Supreme’ reminds us that ambition without boundaries doesn’t lead to fulfillment; it leads to self-betrayal. The real victory isn’t reaching the top at any cost; it’s being able to look at yourself along the way and still recognize who you are. If achieving your dream requires you to humiliate yourself, surrender your autonomy, or tolerate people who don’t respect you, then the dream is already compromised. Money can be earned back. Power can shift hands quickly. Fame fades as priorities change. However, once you give away your self-respect, getting it back is a hell of a lot harder. Choose your boundaries wisely and guard them like your life depends on it.
