Why A Lack of Trust Is So Corrosive to Institutions

“When trust begins to erode, an institution’s ability to function effectively suffers. Increasingly, we see examples of trust being abused, leaders failing to uphold their responsibilities, and organizations struggling to maintain the confidence of the people they serve.”

Without trust, you have nothing. I’ve written before about how trust forms the foundation of any functioning institution, whether it is a government, a business, a school, or a nonprofit organization. When trust begins to erode, an institution’s ability to function effectively suffers. Increasingly, we see examples of trust being abused, leaders failing to uphold their responsibilities, and organizations struggling to maintain the confidence of the people they serve.

Some institutions manage to recover from these failures, while others find themselves trapped in a cycle of dysfunction and destruction. Institutional decay rarely happens overnight. There are warning signs that emerge long before an institution reaches a breaking point. Recognizing these signs is the first step toward understanding why institutions fail, and whether their decline can be reversed.

Trust starts with the leadership at the top and when they make mistakes and don’t acknowledge them or learn from them, break promises to subordinate employees or staff, or violate the rules without facing any consequences, people begin to question whether an institution’s stated values actually mean anything beyond the words written on a piece of paper. Consistent standards must be applied across the board from the lowest to the highest title and when accountability is absent or uneven, depending on who someone is in or who they are connected to, then the damage starts to be done to the larger institution. The damage can also become embedded when there are no consequences given because that individual occupies a certain position, has certain connections, or is politically useful to others rather than being held to the same standards as everyone else in the institution.

Communication becoming absent or less transparent within an institution can also lead to severe damage over time. When leaders don’t communicate, become invasive, or when important decisions are made without any transparency involved, trust can be eroded between members of that organization accordingly. People’s expertise or experiences aren’t taken meaningfully into account often and they are sidelined by those individuals who would rather make decisions on their own without soliciting any meaningful feedback. It is understood that not every decision can be made publicly and confidentiality has a legitimate role to protect information or identities that should not be shared, but absolutely secrecy and a lack of transparency within an institution in terms of decision making can create suspicion due to not being involved in these internal processes.

When people within an institution struggle to be heard, they will stop raising concerns or flagging any issues that could end up costing the institution later. There should be room within institutions for disagreements and debates, especially if it means that concerns or objections are heard rather than completely dismissed from the outset. This is why employees are allowed to form unions, students are allowed to question teachers or principals about a lack of resources, civil servants can share information freely with their superiors without fear of retaliation. These feedback loops are key to keeping any institution functioning for the long haul and without them, trust will erode and then completely go away with enough time. When meetings become more about listening than engagement or when directives become absolute without cause or evidence, then the internal culture will deteriorate over time. Institutions can function normally but still not be healthy when they are not engaging every member to have them contribute healthily or give feedback openly.

Institutions are known to lose their credibility when similar behaviors produce different consequences depending on who is involved or what their title is. People within the institution will then start to believe that success depends less on hard work, competence, or integrity, and that it’s more about favoritism, connections, or proximity to leadership. Morale will plummet internally, legitimacy will be seen as suspect externally, and it takes years or even decades to get back to the prior baseline.

As a response, when trust erodes or goes absent, opposition may form and reforms may happen from outside pressures, but what’s most likely is that there will be quiet withdrawal. People within the institution will not be as engaged, they will do the bare minimum to keep their jobs as they know they will not be rewarded, promoted, or encouraged to do more, because they don’t have that kind of pull within the institution. You can see this when employees ‘quiet quit’ their jobs, citizens disengage from voting or other civic engagements, and members stop participating in organizations they feel they no longer have a voice in.

Yes, the institution will still exist in some form, but it will no longer be a healthy one when the bare minimum is all that you can do because doing anything more is frowned upon or discouraged by those who hold the levers of power and influence. People may continue showing up to be part of the institution, paying their taxes, or completing their work assignments, but their willingness to contribute beyond the minimum has disappeared.

Trust, once lost, is difficult or impossible to recover. It cannot be restored through fancy slogans, public relations campaigns, or demands that people simply have faith in their institutions again. It must be earned through consistent action, accountability, and a willingness to confront uncomfortable truths. Institutions that recognize the warning signs of declining or absent trust have an opportunity to address their shortcomings before the damage becomes irreversible. Those that ignore them risk creating a cycle in which dysfunction breeds further distrust, and distrust makes meaningful reform increasingly difficult.

Ultimately, the question is not whether institutions will make mistakes. They will and that’s okay because any institution is made up of fallible human beings. The question remains whether both the leaders and the average participants in the institution itself possess the integrity, competence, and humility to correct them when the principles and values start to erode. Without those self-correcting qualities or with pressure from the outside, an institution may retain its name, its offices, and its formal authority, but gradually lose the confidence of the people who give it purpose.

Get Used to Rejection

“Rather than hide from a rejection, be ready to embrace and learn from it. Rejections should serve to motivate you to be better, do better, and keep striving forwards to reaching your goals and not letting rejection stop you in your tracks. Get used to rejection because it’s a part of life, but it’s not our whole life.”

Rejection is never enjoyable nor is it pleasant. It is something you always want to forget immediately and to bury it in the recesses of your brain, never to be thought of or remembered again. However, like death and taxes, I truly believe rejection is an inevitable part of life and it happens to everyone. We can never go through life being accepted for everything or being accepted by everyone. Because rejection is so much a part of our life, it is better to face it head on rather than try to hide from it or ignore it completely.

We never really like to address rejection or talk about when they happen. We often feel that reflects who we are rather than what the other person or job or opportunity is looking for. Sure, there are times where maybe we didn’t put the best foot forward or ace the interview or be able to show the best of ourselves to the person(s) considering us, but often, the rejection itself may be a factor of other circumstances beyond what kind of effort you put in or who you are as a person. Even if you get rejected, it’s not a wholesale rejection of who you are but rather there is incompatibility there to begin with or it just wasn’t going to work out in the long run.

It is very hard for us to predict what we will be accepted or rejected for. That fact makes it even more important for us to put ourselves out there even more because the more no’s you get, the likelier it is you’ll eventually get to the ‘yes.’ As the popular expression goes, “Practice makes perfect,” and I do believe it is necessary to face your rejections head on rather than to just get rejected once and then call it quits, never to go through it again. Giving up entirely should not be an option if you want it that badly and you should not be afraid to try again. Yes, rejection hurts and it stings for a while, but it is better for you to build your self-confidence up and shore up your self-esteem by trying than to go through life being afraid of it.

Getting used to rejection does not mean give up after getting the rejection. No, it means you must understand that rejections will happen but the more you try, the likelier it is you’ll find that job, that relationship, that big sale, etc. that you can be proud of after getting to that ‘yes.’ Being rejected is good for one’s ego in that it both keeps it in check and keeps you humble. Maybe you need to do things differently to get that acceptance or maybe work a bit harder or try something new after getting rejected.

You don’t give up, but you keep working at it, getting better, trying again, or even asking the person(s) who rejected you politely why the rejection happened. Asking about the rejection can be a bit sensitive but it doesn’t hurt to see why it wasn’t the right fit or place for you but if an answer isn’t forthcoming, you should just move on and try your efforts elsewhere.

I’m a New York Jets American football fan but I can’t help but think of the story about former New England Patriots quarterback, Tom Brady, when it comes to a story about rejection. Multiple NFL teams chose other quarterbacks ahead of this Hall of Fame player and 198 players went ahead of him in the draft. They essentially rejected him as a quarterback and didn’t think he had it in him to lead their team to a Super Bowl. I’m sure this would have hurt Tom Brady quite a bit waiting for his name to be called. Expecting to be drafted and waiting through 198 players before you in a draft would have that effect on anyone. I’m sure Tom was discouraged but eventually, the New England Patriots took a chance on him and drafted him 199th in the sixth round.

This kind of rejection likely lit a fire under young Tom Brady especially when New England did not consider him at the time to be the kind of NFL quarterback and legend, he turned out to be. Tom did not let the rejection get to him from the other teams, but it motivated him even more to turn those rejections against those teams who did not think he was worth drafting. He worked harder than any other player on the roster, kept his body in better shape than any other quarterback, and put more time in the film room than many NFL veteran players.

The results speak for themselves today as Tom Brady is widely considered the greatest quarterback of all-time and won seven Super Bowl championships and multiple Most Valuable Player (MVP) awards during his 22-year career. Again, I wish the New York Jets had drafted him in the 1st round so we would be talking about how great of a Jets quarterback he was but rejection by my team led to the Patriots getting him later in the sixth round.

I hope that anecdote about Tom Brady, the Patriots former quarterback, will be a lesson for us all on how rejection, while painful and disappointing, can spur us to still be successful and achieve our goals elsewhere. We all are going to get rejected for something whether it’s a job opportunity, making a sale for our company, asking that cute girl or guy for a date with you, or even not being picked to go on a work trip or getting chosen last for the local kickball team. The key is to take it in stride, move on to another opportunity, continue to work hard, improve, and prove the doubters wrong, and to never, ever give up.

Rather than hide from a rejection, be ready to embrace and learn from it. As a child, we don’t know any better when it comes to rejection because it’s so new to us and it hurts the most, but when you’re an adult or even teenager, you should be used to it by now and it should be something that you’re able to handle in a mature manner. It’s never easy but living your life in a way where you avoid it at all costs is neither productive nor healthy. Next time you get rejected, take a deep breath, ask yourself if you put your best effort forward, see where you might have gone wrong or ask for an answer if feasible, and keep moving on and don’t look back. Rejections should serve to motivate you to be better, do better, and keep striving forwards to reaching your goals and not letting rejection stop you in your tracks. Get used to rejection because it’s a part of life, but it’s not our whole life.