Tag: purpose

The Power of Mentorship

Since the days of ancient Greece, the concept of mentoring or mentorship has been apart of human recordkeeping and history. The naming of the word itself ‘mentor’ is said to have come from Homer’s ‘Odyssey’ where the main character, Odysseus, while getting ready to leave for his famous voyage, decided to leave his infant son behind. Because he didn’t want to leave his son alone considering how long his ‘odyssey’ could be, His infant son, Telemachos, was left in the care and companionship of Odysseus’s friend named ‘Mentor.’ From this allegorical story from Homer, we get a sense of how longstanding the idea of mentorship has been around and why it has lasted throughout the centuries.

Why exactly is mentorship so powerful? Well, there are a number of reasons why it can be such a helpful and important part of a person’s success. People very rarely can do everything by themselves and to have the ability to seek out someone who gives them both their time and expertise without asking for anything in exchange is what makes having a mentor so powerful. Now, not everybody starts out being the best mentor. It’s a skill like any other skill that takes time to develop. It’s also impossible to mentor somebody in every aspect of his or her life.

It would be better to focus on an area where you think you can be a good mentor and lend help to another person. For example, if you’re good at writing and consider yourself to be a writer, you should want to mentor someone else who’s aspiring to be a writer and not someone who wants to become a mechanical engineer. Your mentoring has to line up with the mentee’s aspirations and what they hope to do in the future. Mentorship doesn’t only have to be professional advice but it can also involve be personal advice as well. Mentorship can range from how to learn a new skill set in order to make more money to being able to manage your personal relationships better.

Before mentorship can begin though, a level of trust has to be built up over time between the mentor and the mentee. When you’ve taken upon the role of the mentor, it’s important to make sure that you think that the mentee can be successful and that they can put in the work and effort to reach their goals. If somebody is mentoring you, it’s important to make sure that you know them well already, you respect them, and you find that they have good expertise and knowledge in the field or area that you need mentoring in.

A mentor doesn’t have to be a boss or a co-worker. It could also be a friend or family member who you have a close relationship to and is able to give you sound advice based off of their personal and/or professional experiences. When it comes to mentorship, it has to be a consistent and long-standing relationship between two people. The mentor and the mentee should be meeting on a weekly, bi-weekly, or monthly basis together in order to make actual real and sustained progress on both their short-term and long-term goals. If you’re only meeting with a mentor once every month or every three months, it’s not going to work out and you’ll be lucky to make any lasting progress. If mentorship is done right, the mentee will see themselves go far in the area, skillset, or field that they’re focusing on especially if the mentor is giving out real, practical advice that they themselves have proven to work.

For mentorship to be successful, it’s important that this kind of relationship between two people be a two-way street and not just a one-sided affair. The mentee should not be getting 100% of the benefits out of the mentorship because respect and appreciation has to be paid from the mentee to the mentor. Time, as we all know, is quite valuable and for a mentor to be giving his time freely to the mentee especially on a weekly or monthly basis is a very selfless thing to be doing. While the mentor should not expect anything in return right away, a healthy mentorship would involve the mentee taking it upon himself to show his appreciation and thanks through small gestures. It could be buying your mentor a gift for the holidays or buying them a ticket to a baseball game or a concert but it’s important to show that you care about the mentorship and that you realize it’s nice to give back every now and then.

If you’ve built up a strong personal friendship with your mentor, it would be nice for the mentee to spend time with the mentor outside of their formal meetings / sit-downs, etc. For example, if you two have shared interests outside of business, you can go out together for dinner, or do an activity together. Mentorships don’t have to be strictly business all of the time and the best mentorships are when both parties like each other and would consider themselves to be good friends. One of the key powers of mentorship is its’ sustainability and longevity when it’s done right. A fruitful mentorship of months and even years can definitely change the course of a person’s life. While not the easiest thing in life to take upon oneself, being a mentor to someone is one of the most rewarding things a person can do and it’s an easy way to make the world a bit better than before.

Unfortunately, true mentorship today isn’t as prevalent as it used to be and is a far cry from what it was like just a generation or two ago. Most people today do not have a mentor in their lives to help them who can they rely on for good advice without paying money. If you’re able to be a mentor to someone who needs your help or advice, it is something that should be seriously considered especially if that person has a lot of potential. Mentorships shouldn’t always be thought of in terms of the mentor being older the mentee in terms of age.

That’s a fallacy in that there are ways in which older people can learn from younger people especially in this current digital age of technology. The power of mentorships lies in the inherent decency of one person helping another person to get ahead in life in any way that they can. The mentee can then take the advice to heart and work hard to improve themselves in professional and/or personal ways. The mentee should show gratitude and appreciation to the mentor because having a good mentor who is generous with his time is not easy to find these days. While mentorships and apprenticeships were more common a generation or two ago, they are exceedingly rare nowadays. If you’re able to have a good mentor in your life, remember to be grateful for it and pay it back in the future by mentoring another person who is growing through the same struggles and setbacks that you once conquered yourself.

If there were more active mentoring going on between people, not only would their own individual lives improve over time but also that of the local community and society as a whole. When more and more folks are willing to give back to others in their community and help them out consistently, that helps out the society in general. The power of mentorship is also a reminder that we’re all in this together and we should try to spur on success of others rather than kick them down a notch. You’ll feel happier and more engaged in the world to when you give mentorship a shot so I encourage those of you reading this article to go out there, think about why mentorship is important, and figure out if that is a calling that you personally would like to take upon in the future in an effort to help other people help themselves.

Moments of Quiet Reflection

In a world full of noise and frenzy, it’s to one’s advantage to have some quiet moments of reflection every now and then. It doesn’t have to be every day but five to ten minutes for a couple of times per week can really make a difference in helping you do some self-reflection. Activities like Yoga, Meditation, or just doing deep breathing exercises will allow your mind to quiet itself and reflect on nothing at all or to concentrate on a specific thought. Hearing your own voice and thoughts in your mind is not easy to do but it helps put your past, present, and future into a clearer perspective. It’s a real and underrated pleasure in letting your thoughts run away to new places and but to still control where they go.

Personally, I enjoy my own reflections late at night when the world is quiet and I’m getting ready to fall sleep. I can freely think about past memories that make me smile, and contemplate events on the horizon in my future. Having tried meditation in the past, I can also let go of any and all thoughts that I want to do away with in order to become a clean slate unto myself. Reflecting upon my actions, thoughts, and feelings makes me more introspective and observant, which allows me to acknowledge my overall strengths and weaknesses as a person. Being self-aware of who you are, where you’re going, where you’ve been, and how you got there are all elements in developing a personal sense of meaning and fulfillment.

Listening to ones’ conscience and honing ones’ idea of self is increasingly important in maintaining a sense of identity and purpose. Too often these days, we are with the world all of the time and are constantly absorbing the thoughts and feelings of many other people. While interacting with other is a crucial part of life, we must continue to listen to and reflect on our own thoughts, feelings, and actions. We shouldn’t always act on what we feel, or say what we think, but having these thoughts and reflecting on their origins and meanings should not be discouraged.

Often, we as human beings can care way too much about what other people think, feel, and say about us. It is simply not productive to let others’ thoughts of you consume your own sense of self and purpose. All of us have a limited amount of information that we can take in to our minds, absorb, and act on so we have to choose what’s really important to let into our heads.

In the age of Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and social media in general, it’s all too easy to get caught up on in what’s going on in the external world without taking note of what we’re experiencing in our internal world. Indulging in everybody else’s words all of the time will leave you disoriented and overwhelmed. Listening to your own voice above everybody else’s is necessary to have a true sense of self. Make sure to always have a strong identity and a purpose. If that takes more daily quiet reflections, then you should make those a priority in your life. When you are always tuned into the lives of other people, you forget to live your own life.

Live according to your own purpose and vision before considering the thoughts and opinions of others. Yes, while it’s always important to listen and seek guidance from friends and family, sometimes you have to go your own way and follow your destiny, even if you don’t know where that road may lead. Having an active life makes for a stronger and healthier individual.

Be quiet and reflect when your mind feels cluttered and overwhelmed. Take a few deep breaths and relax. Let your mind shut off or let it wander into your memories and experiences. Turn off your phone and the computer to just ‘be present’ in the moment. Let the flow of information and data of the world not influence you in these precious few moments.

The only thoughts and feelings you should be listening to should be your own during these times. Hear your own voice and think about your past, present, and future or try not to think at all. Remember your own ‘why’ of living and maintain your personal bearings. After these crucial moments of quiet reflection, you’ll better understand who you are as a person and what your conscience is telling you. Always allow yourself some time to be present in your own mind, and your mind alone.

Self-Sufficiency

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“If Aristotle is wrong about this, then I don’t want to be right.”

Self-sufficiency: “Able to supply one’s own or its’ own needs without external assistance.” (Noun – Dictionary.com)

Overlooked and misunderstood by many, the concept of self-sufficiency is important for realizing one’s potential as a person and for achieving true independence and maturity. Especially for those of us including myself whom are going through the 20’s, this is a period in our lives where we must rely on ourselves first for our success and prosperity before we reach out to others for help. I believe that it’s natural to ask for the mental and emotional support from your friends and family but there comes a time in a man and woman’s life where they must strike it out on their own and attempt to realize their self-sufficiency.

For different people, being self-sufficient could mean different things. It could be paying off your student loans or enrolling in a trade school to learn skills in order to become more employable. For others, it could be owning/renting your first apartment (without roommates), shopping and/or growing your own food, and changing a flat tire / getting your oil changed. Millennials are often criticized as the ‘Peter Pan’ generation considering that we come back to live with our parents after college in order to save money. I can’t say that this is a good trend but it is mostly due to a tough economy and a lack of good job opportunities, especially for those who were affected by the ‘Great Recession’ of 2007-2009 and still are to this day.

Rather than being discouraged and dismayed by the recent economic troubles affecting our generation, it is important to realize the opportunities that are out there. For realizing opportunities and achieving self-sufficiency in different areas, the Internet is perhaps the greatest tool out there for changing your future. We are quite lucky in that it is incredibly easy and free to access an almost infinite amount of information, both educational and informative, that can change our course in life if you are able to do the research and put the work in.

I can honestly say that learning self-sufficiency is vital in this day and age. Being able to take care of your body, your mind, your apartment/house, your car are all-important to be a fully functioning adult. In addition, managing and developing your finances, having healthy relationships, working successfully with co-workers, clients, and bosses are all steps on the path to self-sufficiency.

Most people stumble into ‘adulthood’ and will fail to become self-sufficient in their lives and suffer negative emotional and psychical health as a result. Resolve to yourself that you will take the steps necessary to become a mature adult who can take care of business and be able to function in society.

A lot of the problems and maladies of society originate from a lack of self-sufficiency and a heavy reliance on others (friends, family, and neighbors) to help them out continuously. I mentioned before that mental, emotional support from others including friends and family is necessary and even should be encouraged. However, don’t rely on others as a crutch because the people in your life won’t be there forever. They love you and want you to succeed in life but it is your job to make it happen. Your family and friends can’t hold your hand and walk you through every problem and setback you will experience. It is a common fact of wisdom that life will beat you down and keep you there if you let it. Achieving self-sufficiency in the necessary areas of life will make you happier, stronger, more resilient, and a better person overall.

Once you become self—sufficient and confident in your abilities, it is natural that you might want to share this with another person such as a wife, husband, and children. That is a reflection of your realization that you have become a full adult and can handle the responsibilities of helping future generations to become self-sufficient as well. Even if you do not marry or have kids, it’s possible to impact others and lead them down the road to self-sufficiency as well. Mentoring young people, being a leader in the community, and encouraging others to succeed can help lead others down the path of self-sufficiency as well.

After achieving self-sufficiency in your life, you can truly focus on the hobbies and interests that challenge and stimulate you. Human beings thrive in life when we conquer both internal and external challenges. Learning an instrument, studying a foreign language, dedicating yourself to a project at work or at home, or achieving mastery in different subjects are all great ways to keep yourself stimulated and happy.

People become unhappy when all they do is consume and don’t do anything to make themselves better. When all you do is watch TV and films but don’t know how to make them, or eat at fine restaurants but don’t know how to cook the food itself, and listen to music without knowing how to play an instrument or how its’ actually produced. Becoming self-sufficient is a result of handling the struggles and challenges of life with confidence and resolve.

In addition, having hobbies and interests in the pursuit of continuous knowledge and wisdom is extremely important to becoming a whole person. Anxiety, depression, and other issues manifest themselves when people can’t take care of themselves mentally, physically, and emotionally. Don’t be one of those people. Work hard to become a mature and capable adult in our society. I promise that you won’t regret it.