Tag: life

Being Sentimental

Is it worth it for a person to be sentimental? Is it healthy or unhealthy to hold on to certain items, memories, or keepsakes for the long-term? Like most things in life, there is a balance that has to be struck when it comes to sentimentality. Some folks are not sentimental at all and don’t have much care for old family photos or for holding on to gifts beyond their initial utility. Other people are much more sentimental and hold on to personal keepsakes for years on end allowing their living spaces and their memories to become cluttered as time goes by.

As you get older, your memories will inevitably start to fade away so certain items, keepsakes, and important people in your life can help you to remember certain moments of your past that you’ll want to preserve due to their importance to you. Not everything and not everyone from your past will live on in your memories so you have to be responsible enough to choose what really matters to you and which memories mean the most to you going forward. Being able to balance your sentimentality will help you to become a more mature and emotionally healthier adult.

In my possessions, I have a duffel bag, which has some sentimental value to me. I tend to be a more sentimental person than most people and I try to collect photographs and hold on to personal keepsakes as long as I can. One of the items that is particularly sentimental to me is my duffel bag. There’s nothing particularly notable about this duffel bag based on its’ design, style or purpose. Its’ similar to most other duffel bags on the market and can be used for multiple purposes including trips to other places, which is something that I have done a lot of the past couple of years.

The one thing that visually stands out about this duffel bag is its’ logo. Its’ a black duffel bag with a logo of a purple dragon and the name ‘Saprissa’ embroidered in the same logo. ‘Saprissa’ is short for ‘Deportivo Saprissa’, which is a popular Costa Rican football club based out of San Jose, the capital of the country. The duffel bag’s significance to me isn’t based out of its’ usability, color, or design but rather its’ importance lies in where I bought the item and what I have done with it since then.

The reason why this particular duffel bag is sentimental to me, and why I have continuously used it for almost a decade now is because it brings back a lot of memories for me. Ever since I bought the Saprissa duffel bag back in 2008 when I was studying the Spanish language in Costa Rica, I’ve held on to it and have brought it around the world with me.

From short trips to Jordan and the Czech Republic to my long-stays in Turkey and Colombia, this duffel bag has been to almost as many foreign countries as I have. What the bag lacks in style or design, it makes up for it in terms of substance and reliability. For over eight years, my duffel bag has weathered mud, dirt, snow, rain, wind, and other natural elements that I’ve traveled in along with the dozens of taxi, train, plane, and bus rides I’ve been on. It’s never failed me and it has concurrently led to me becoming more and more attached to using it for each of my trips to distant places.

After almost nine years of using this duffel bag, like all things, its’ starting to show physical wear and tear. Most likely, I should have stopped using it after two or three years but the memories always seem to flow back to me when I see the bag lying there in my room or when I pack it up for another trip. The bag itself is linked to the places I’ve been, the people I’ve met, the meals I’ve had, and the experiences that were tied into the adventures I’ve gone through with the help of this simple, black duffel bag which I carried along with me.

The bag handle is starting to fray, the zippers are exhausted, and the strap material is starting to rupture, and I think it may be time for a new duffel bag. It will be difficult for me to stop using the Saprissa bag that I’ve grown so accustomed to over the years. You simply can’t transfer those powerful memories to another bag quite so easily. The best you can do is mentally let your attachment dissolve, get rid of the bag, and transfer those special memories over to those other keepsakes and photographs that will remind you similarly of your past adventures.

Everything and everyone in your past will fade away to some degree. The important thing is to have one or two things left in your possession that you can fall back on so those items can also trigger those past memories for you to remember and recollect, whether they were joyous, happy, sad, or challenging. Being sentimental about all the things from your past can lead to a cluttered memory and a lack of set priorities. However, having one or two items from a trip or event can be enough to give you all the memories and remembrance you need in order to feel connected to your past.

Finding that particular balance of healthy sentimentality is a lifelong struggle but it helps to pave the way for a complete and fulfilling life. The key is to not the let the remembrance of your past keep you from living in the present and from creating your future. Your sentimentality should not prevent you from making new memories, creating new friendships, and forming new bonds with keepsakes.

Like my duffel bag, certain objects will fade away so it may be best to sustain your past with personal photographs, writings, or even paintings so that your memories can feel more permanent and can even be enjoyed by your friends and family members long after the day when you’re no longer around. Where you can let go of your sentimentality is when you realize that some things will be taken away from you whether you like it or not sometimes and it’s not productive to fight against this fact of life.

The best you can do is to place your memories into different items whether it be a journal or a photo album, which are much more sturdy and reliable than my trusty yet fading duffel bag. Above all else, Sentimentality is about caring. As an adult, you have to find out what’s truly worth caring about. If you’re lucky, you’ll be able to replace what’s been lost and hold on to the memories that are special to you. You have to be ready to let go one day because nothing lasts forever.

Cartagena

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Camera: Canon PowerShot SX710 HS

Location: Cartagena, Colombia

The Limits of Perception

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“Do you see what I see?”

“Perception” is an interesting word when you think deeply about it. No, I’m not just talking about your two eyes, and the vision that allows you to perceive the world visually. In other words, we can only perceive the experiences that we have or had in the past, the people we met, the places we visited and lived in, and the choices that we make or made.

Human beings are mortal which means we have limited time on this Earth to see and experience all that life has to offer. For some people, this is a very frightening and gloomy notion. However, others would see this fact as a way to get the most out of life and expand their perception of the world as much as possible.

A limited “perception” of life and the world has consequences when you think about it. If you don’t have the ability to put yourself into someone else’s shoes or to imagine or experience life as they do, then your ability to emphasize with them would be diminished. Yes, you can have sympathy for their plights or jubilation for their successes but you wouldn’t be able to connect with them on a deeper level.

A consistent problem in human nature is our lack of ability to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes and see life as they do. When we are unable to break down barriers between social classes, races, religions, and gender, disagreements and hostilities between these groups is likely to continue. From my perspective and my past travels, the similarities of humans around the world drastically outweigh the differences. That doesn’t mean that these differences are bad or that they should be eliminated. I happen to believe that cultural and social differences are part of what makes humanity unique and should not be demonized.

This leaves the question that my blog readers would wonder to themselves hopefully after reading this entry: How do I expand my perception of life and the world around me? Now, when I ask this question, I do not mean for you to go out to the nearest pharmacy and get yourself some contacts or a pair of prescription glasses.

What I mean and what I believe is that we humans have limited time on Earth and we can’t live forever to experience everything and to meet everybody around the world. However, there are ways to expand this perception by traveling the world, reading books, and meeting different kinds of people. These three concepts are not crazy ideas but rather novel concepts to create greater empathy in yourself and for others along with a more profound view of humanity as a whole.

Traveling has always had the highest return on investment for me and the experiences I have had have helped me view the world in a different way. I know that it’s not feasible for everyone to travel but if you can’t make a huge jump to another country, try to travel to different places and cities within your own country. Learning about the local culture and customs, enjoying the local cuisine, and indulging in the history and background of the society are important for any seasoned traveler.

You will start to view the world in shades of grey rather than pure black and white. You would also learn that cultures and societies are complex and that it takes a lot of time to immerse yourself in its deeper reaches. Most of all, you are communicating in a different language which is fascinating and complex in its own right. Above all else, you are seeing the commonalities and similarities that exist between your family and their family, your town and their town, and your country and their country.

Meeting new people from different backgrounds and places ties into traveling as well but it really makes your perception of the world grow. If you stay in the same town where you grow up and never leave, chances are that you’ll have a limited perception of people and life itself. Talking to different people, hearing their stories, cooking with them, and sharing a meal or drink has many benefits. You may be able to build a friendship that lasts for years even if you don’t speak the same language or come from the same culture.

By hearing their story and listening to them, you expand your own perception of the world and the people who inhabit it. You can get beyond the stereotypes and the clichés and really get into deeper social connections with people, especially in this interconnected world that we all live in.

Lastly, reading books is an integral park for learning about the world and facilitating a deeper perception. As individuals, we cannot experience everything or know everything there is to know. However, by reading about the stories of others who have come before you and who had lived, and died, you will gain greater knowledge and wisdom. Regardless of whether the book is fiction or non-fiction, you’re reading someone’s life story or reading about a subject that spans a part of human history.

Book by book, you are enlightening yourself by learning about the experiences and perceptions of others. By learning about the men and women who have come before you and who have lived exemplary and distinguished lives, you can take lessons from their existence and apply those lessons to your own life. If you can’t travel or meet different kinds of people, reading books by those authors who have and whom shared those unique experiences with their readers is the next best thing.

We all have one live to life, and you can only see what’s right in front of your eyes. Make sure that you continue to give yourself the opportunities and chances to indulge in the knowledge and wisdom that can be gained by expanding your perception of the world and its inhabitants. Travel, read books, and meet different people for as long as you may live. Only then will you gain true enlightenment and wisdom.

The Ripple Effect

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Which chocolate will you decide to choose?

Throughout the course of our lives, actions and events occur that we don’t see coming or have little control over. While these small events and actions seem unimportant at the time, their results continue to spread and manifest in changing things about yourself, and your path in life. This is known as the ‘Ripple Effect’, and is often overlooked by certain people who refuse to recognize that actions have consequences and what we say or do now has lasting effects on who we will become in the future.

The most famous example signifying the ‘Ripple Effect’ is when drops of water or other objects, fall into a larger pool of water causing ‘ripples’ to manifest themselves while affecting the initial state and changing its physical makeup. Similar in overall meaning to the ‘Ripple Effect’ is the ‘Butterfly Effect’ and also the ‘Domino Effect’ often cited in sociological terminology.

The older you get, the more you realize that certain things in life are going to be outside your control. Some people refuse to recognize this fact and try to direct and manage everything in life to prevent any surprises, twists, or turns that will come your way. However, this approach is a recipe for disaster because it is a fact that we cannot control everything that happens to us and that it is pointless to try to do so.

I don’t want to turn this into a “Predestination v. Free Will” debate because that is too black and white for a world that has a lot of grey matter. If you had asked me about the concepts ‘Free Will’, ‘Destiny’, and ‘Fate’ when I was ten years younger, I would have said that I have complete control over my life and that my destiny is totally in my hands. At my current age and the older I get, I believe that it is a intertwining mix of destiny and your own will that sees you through both the highs and lows of life.

From my own personal experiences, especially as I enter my mid-20’s, there have been many unexpected occurrences that have changed my life in different ways which would have been unimaginable to me in the past. I never would have thought that I would become an ESL teacher, move overseas and travel to different countries, and change my career path for the time being. There are cities that I have visited, cool experiences that I have had, and lessons that I have learned about life that would not have had happened had I stayed in the same town, kept my first job after college, and not gone out of my way to meet new people, make new friends.

It’s occurred to me now more than ever that we should not plan for everything in the future because the future is not up to us and life can throw unexpected curveballs when we least expect it. Instead of ‘cursing our fate’ and ‘falling into gloom and doom’ about the things we cannot control: (job security, natural disasters, deaths of family and friends), we should make an effort to change what we can control to benefit out lives: (relationships, where we live, and our physical and mental health.)

‘Free Will’ for human beings is limited as is ‘Pre-Destination.’ I would like to believe that I have some control over my life and the direction(s) it can take. However, I cannot change anything about my past and I am limited in what I can do about my future. Do not feel totally helpless about your future because you still have the power of decision-making, reasoning, and foresight, which can help you with your personal and professional goals.

It’s much easier to be angry at the world and to curse about the wrongs that have been committed against you but it won’t do much to make you feel better or to improve your future. Instead of feeling powerless, take charge and do your best with what you have now. Make every day a chance to improve yourself in some way so that your future will be a little bit brighter than before.

Never give up, and if challenges and set-backs come your way, meet them head-on and have the resolve to face them given your previous experiences in life. As was once said famously by the character, Forrest’s mother, in the critically acclaimed film, Forrest Gump, “Life is like a box of chocolates, Forrest, you never know what you’re going to get.” Even if you get a bad chocolate every now and then, there will still be plenty more to choose from.

The Conundrum of Choice

Life can be a lot like a cereal aisle sometimes. Too many choices, and not enough time.
Life can be a lot like a cereal aisle sometimes. Too many choices, and not enough time.

No other mental task can be so challenging and exhausting yet invigorating as making a choice. The concept of “Choice” is a behavioral process that we each undergo hundreds of times each day and they can either be the most routine, mundane of decisions to be made or those that are very rare and of great importance. These choices that we make can either have the most immediate or long-term impacts on our lives.

I tend to sometimes naively overlook how important choice is in determining one’s destiny or fate in life. As human beings, we make so many choices each day that it’s difficult to discern from what’s valuable to what really doesn’t matter in the grander scheme of things. This also plays into one’s individual perception of what is and what isn’t important in life, which is a long debate that should be left for another thinker. I was walking through the local grocery store going through the vast, tall aisles and felt completely overwhelmed.

Who knew that choosing cereal these days could come with so many options to choose from? I was completely flummoxed at first and ended up just placing a random cereal in my cart out of frustration and bewilderment. This is an example of a choice that really is quite basic when you think of it but may have had it’s importance overstated since there are now more choices than ever.

Clearly, most people in this world today do not have access to these many choices as we do here in the United States and other developed countries but it makes you think that we should be lucky for all the choosing we get to do on a daily basis. We should not take for granted in our society how many choices we do have and how many decisions we can make as independent people who have the freedom to make these kinds of decisions.

 Many people living in the world today have very limited options and are unable to make choices because they are not allowed to or do not have the option to. Next time, you’re meandering in the cereal aisle for perhaps a bit longer than you should, think about the weight of this choice and whether or not it is worth the time or the effort because there are many other choices to be made throughout the day and they may be a bit more important than “Fruity Pebbles or Cheerio’s?”