One of the biggest vineyards in the Bourdeaux wine growing region of France: Chateau Soutard was a delightful winery to visit on a trip to France in the Summer of 2024.
Camera: iPhone 15
Location: Chateau Soutard; Saint-Émilion, Gironde, France
“As much as it is important to socialize and be around friends, it can also be good to be alone, focus on yourself, and enjoy a little solitude.”
Sometimes, it’s good to recharge your batteries alone. We all need real social connection and friendship, that is for certain, but there is nothing wrong with seeking out solitude to enjoy your alone time. Everybody has a different tolerance for how much time alone they can handle before they seek out a social event, gathering, or activity to dust off the cobwebs and not let one’s social skills atrophy. As much as it is important to socialize and be around friends, it can also be good to be alone, focus on yourself, and enjoy a little solitude.
Solitude often has a negative connotation, and it is often associated with having it imposed on you or having it done without consent such as the similar phrasing of ‘solitary confinement.’ That kind of solitude is denigrating to one’s spirit and causes one to mentally break over time. Just like endless solitude is harmful to one’s health, I also think that is true for the opposite side of the spectrum when you are constantly surrounded by other people, some of them mere acquaintances or coworkers for which you are forced to be around and whose company you do not enjoy. There are many forms of loneliness, and it is true that you can be as lonely by yourself as you can in a room full of people who don’t care for you, or you don’t care for them.
If you are around people who constantly want something from you or need something from you, that can be as draining as it is to have no one to talk to or to share life with. Just as a balance of having some social activity is good for you, it is as important to be on your own sometimes and enjoy one’s own company. There have been times in my own life where I have sought to be on my own deliberately, not because I didn’t enjoy being around others, but that I needed the time alone to meditate, to think, to reflect, to problem solve, and to more fully observe the world around me. In extroverted cultures including in the United States, this kind of activity can be thought of as strange or unusual, but I find that my best ideas or my most relaxing moments can be on my own and even when doing nothing but just the art of being present in the world.
We constantly are having our attention pulled to the next meeting, the next call, the next trip, the next gathering that we can forget to take the time to be on our own in whatever form that may take. Solitary kind of activities have gone out of style lately for some people whether that is reading, writing, walking, meditating, or just doing nothing (looking at your phone doesn’t count here). While these things can be done in concert with other people around, these activities are best done alone in my view and help me to recharge so I can be more present and engaged when seeing friends or family members.
You shouldn’t wait on other people to live your life too even if it’s by yourself. If you must be alone for a little while on a trip, at a concert, in the library, and generally out in public by yourself, it is not the end of the world. No one is judging you for doing life solo sometimes and it can be healthy to do so. Rather than giving too many people too little of your attention or having it split too often, why not focus all of your attention on something singular such as the footsteps you take on a walk, the thoughts in your head as you absorb a good book, and the clacking of a keyboard as you work on your novel.
Being alone all the time is not healthy, I want to make that clear, but it’s also not healthy either to be surrounded by people all the time. Part of being a healthy adult is working to have a little solitude, a little social life, and mix it all together to rewarding yet refreshing lifestyle. By being on your own sometimes, you’ll be more reflective, more observant, more self-aware, and treasure those social moments more when you’re more present, more engaged, and happier to have that social muscle stimulated.
I’ve always been an advocate for a moderate and balanced life and that is why solitude should not always be shunned for someone to progress as a person. Our deepest thoughts, our brightest ideas, our healthiest habits aren’t always cultivated around other people, which is why it is important to use one’s solitude to see if you can think deeper, live better, and build more because your attention is focused inwards rather than outwards. Find out what your tolerance for solitude is and then see what it can give you when you’re alone, because you would be surprised how relaxing and necessary it can be, especially when you put that solitary time to good use.
Enjoying a nice scenic boat ride out on the Chesapeake Bay on Maryland’s Eastern Shore. The tides were calm and the wind was fierce but a good time was had by all.
Camera: iPhone 15
Location: Chesapeake Bay, Maryland
My fifth set of Spanish poems focusing on the springtime, solitude, Guatemala, and experiences becoming new memories.
2. Primavera Eterna
Quisiera ver las flores y toda la belleza
Por toda mi vida
El sol me da fuerza para enfrentar la vida
La belleza que no va a dañarme nunca
El florecimiento de la vida animal y vegetal
Es donde quiero estar por siempre
3. La Soledad
Al principio, me siento bien
La paz y la tranquilidad
Pero la soledad no es para todos los días
Es algo que puede destruirte sin interrupción
La conexión es insustituible
Nosotros nos necesitamos como humanos
4. Los Colores de Guatemala
Un país con belleza inmensa
Colores brillantes, ropa brillante y alimentos brillantes
Casi demasiado para mis ojos avellana absorber
Belleza natural se mezcla con belleza humana
Guatemala, impresionante y expresionista
Quisiera explorar la cacofonía de colores aquí
5. Ahora, es un Recuerdo
Momentos bonitos que ya están en el pasado
Quiero volver, pero ya no puedo más
Recapturar el mismo sentimiento será imposible
Los recuerdos que compartimos fueron especiales
Yo sé que solo existen en mi mente ahora, pero para mí
Todos mis días voy a recordarlos y a ti también
A beautiful Fall Day to go hiking in San Diego at Sunset Cliffs Natural Park from October 2023.
Camera: iPhone 12
Location: Sunset Cliffs Natural Park; San Diego, California, United States
Seeing Jackson Browne Live in Concert at The Venetian Theatre in Las Vegas, Nevada.
Camera: iPhone 12
Location: The Venetian Theatre; Las Vegas, Nevada, United States
“As we enter the new year of 2025, this mindset offers a guide to prioritizing experiences and hobbies that bring both joy and excitement as we aim to lead more fulfilling lives.”
In this age of social media and the constant pressure to prioritize self-expression, the concept of having “main character energy” has recently captured the imagination of popular culture. This recent internet-born slang expression reflects the central idea of viewing your life as a narrative where you’re the protagonist, who is taking charge of your story, and embracing a sense of adventure, purpose, and individuality in what you choose to do in your free time. As we enter the new year of 2025, this mindset offers a guide to prioritizing experiences and hobbies that bring both joy and excitement as we aim to lead more fulfilling lives.
What exactly does it mean to have “main character energy”? At its core, “main character energy” is about seeing yourself as the center of your life, with complete control over what you do, where you go, and who you spend your time with. At its essence, it’s about celebrating authenticity, confidence, and self-awareness. Popular culture has fueled this idea, emphasizing the need to live boldly and create new memories through having unique experiences, both individually and with others in your life.
The concept also ties into the broader cultural shift toward mindfulness and self-care. Being the “main character” doesn’t mean being self-absorbed or ignoring others. Rather, it’s about finding as much meaning as possible in your daily life and curating experiences that reflect your passions and interests. It’s also about stepping out of your comfort zone to challenge yourself with new activities and experiences. Instead of falling into an endless and mundane routine throughout the year, having “main character energy” means starting a new hobby, embarking on a trip to a new place, or learning a skill you’ve been curious about.
Living with “main character energy” is less about the aesthetics of a lifestyle and more about harnessing your mindset and actions. It’s about taking ownership of your narrative and injecting it with moments that make life feel both cinematic and memorable. Here’s how you can channel this energy in 2025:
First, prioritize your experiences over material things. In 2025, we should focus more on trading material possessions for memorable experiences. Whether it’s traveling to a new city or country, trying a new restaurant down the street, taking a salsa dance class, or learning a new language, stepping out of your comfort zone can create unforgettable memories and help you grow as a person.
Additionally, rediscover those hobbies that ignite your creativity or start new ones. Painting, writing, coding, gardening, hiking, or even starting a book club can make your life feel more vibrant and less routine. When you invest in your passions, your life gains greater depth, and you become more connected to your overall story.
Main character moments aren’t reserved for those grand adventures that may occur just once a year or a few times each year. They’re also about making the most of the mundane in our daily lives. Romantic or memorable moments can exist in small, everyday joys, no matter how routine they seem. Sipping coffee in the morning, walking through a park, listening to the birds chirping, or watching a sunset can feel magical when you slow down and savor the moment instead of rushing to the next task.
If you’re a fan of cinema or books, you’ll notice protagonists in movies and novels take leaps of faith and so should you. Apply for that dream job, take a sabbatical to travel the world, confess your feelings to someone you love, or start a side hustle or passion project and see it grow. Bold moves in your life create turning points in your personal story.
Engaging in “main character” activities in your life means intentionally seeking out joy, adventure, and self-expression instead of waiting for them to find you, which rarely happens. It’s about taking a solo trip and feeling the thrill of independence, creating a music playlist that feels like the soundtrack to your life, or hosting a themed dinner party with friends who share your interests and passions. These moments don’t just fill your time or break up your routine; they also enrich your narrative.
In 2025 and beyond, prioritizing “main character energy” means embracing life with a renewed sense of wonder and enthusiasm. It’s about creating the biggest story worth telling: the one of a life, filled with curiosity, courage, and connection. When you step into the role of the main character, you’re not just living life like everyone else is. You are choosing instead to make it truly your own with your own interests, passions, and joys at the forefront, thriving as a result and making the most of the limited time we have on this planet. The best part of embracing the “main character” energy in your own life? The pen is always in your hands to write your own story as you see fit.
“Evaluating the year that has passed can be a valuable exercise for yourself to gain deeper insights, identify growth opportunities for the new year, and celebrate the accomplishments or successes you had.”
2024 is ending soon as I write this article and I do believe it is important to look back on the year that was to evaluate it holistically, such as whether it was good, bad, or a mixed bag. Evaluating the year that has passed can be a valuable exercise for yourself to gain deeper insights, identify growth opportunities for the new year, and celebrate the accomplishments or successes you had.
Reflecting on various aspects of your life, even areas that you can improve upon will help you to set meaningful goals for the year ahead. Here’s a guide I have created on how to evaluate your year comprehensively, focusing on the five major areas of friends, family, relationships, experiences, and work or business.
Friends
Friendships are an essential part of life and key to one’s mental health as a surefire way to stay truly connected and bond over shared activities or hobbies or even lend each other a helping hand. Think about reflecting on your relationships with friends from over the past year. Ask yourself the following questions when doing so:
Document the moments and memories that stood out to you, whether they were fun gatherings, heart-to-heart conversations, or instances where you and your friends supported each other through a difficult time. Evaluate if there were any friendships that became draining or unbalanced and consider whether to address these issues or set boundaries or even cut off the friendship if it isn’t working out.
Family
Family relationships can greatly influence your emotional well-being in both positive but also negative ways depending on your own situation with your family members. I encourage you to reflect on the past year’s interactions with your family members and consider these questions:
Think about whether you balanced your time and energy across the various family member dynamics that are constantly evolving each year along with the different personalities that you have in your family. Identify some ways to strengthen bonds with family members next year who may need more of your attention or love than you were able to give up until this point.
Relationships
If you’re in a romantic relationship currently, evaluating this aspect of your life is crucial to keeping it on the right track into next year. Even if you’re single, reflecting on your relationship with yourself or any potential romantic connections is just as important. Ask yourself these questions as you close out the year:
Identify areas where you’ve grown together as a couple or individually when you two were apart. If there were challenges this year, consider how you’ll address them moving forward in your relationship.
Experiences (Travel, Hobbies, Interests, Fun Activities)
Reflect on how you spent your free time outside of work, school, or business and how engaged with life outside of your daily obligations and weekly chores you were. Think about where you went, what you did, what you learned, and how much you enjoyed life beyond the office or the shop or the factory floor. Consider the following in your assessment of your experiences:
Take note of the activities, hobbies, interests, etc. that brought you the most happiness and fulfillment. If your year felt monotonous and a bit too routine, think about incorporating more variety or adventure into your life next year. Plan the destinations, places, or cities with regards to travel ahead of time that you hope to visit in the new year.
Work or Business
Your professional or business life is another crucial area to evaluate at the end of any year as it makes up about 80% of our time throughout the year. Reflect on your career or business journey over the past year by asking yourself these questions:
Reflect on whether your work or business aligns with your personal values and passions. If there are gaps in that assessment, start thinking about how to address them in the coming year with regards to making your work or business more personally fulfilling Once you’ve reviewed these areas and answered as many questions in these five major areas as possible, combine your thoughts to identify patterns, strengths, and areas for improvement.
Lastly, think about the following ways generally on how you could make next year the best one yet:
Evaluating your year holistically gives you a clearer perspective on where you stand in your life and how to move forward in a positive manner. Use this article, the questions I’ve posed and to write a yearly reflection about these five major areas as a substantive foundation for setting meaningful goals and resolutions for the year ahead.
Ben Folds performing live in concert at the Kennedy Center in Washington, DC, USA in the Fall of 2023.
Camera: iPhone 12
Location: The Kennedy Center; Washington, District of Columbia, United States
A unique visual art experience and exhibit in Washington, DC.
Camera: iPhone 12
Location: Artechouse; Washington, District of Columbia, United States
